annoying ads

I probably watch too much TV. Once in a while, there are ads that, for one reason or another, drive me up the wall. For the purposes of this discussion, I will avoid the interminable Subway ads that come on at every WWE commercial break.

First, the latest Bowflex ad is driving me up the wall. To Brian Alvarez, the cocky @#$% who says he gave his fat clothes to his fat friends, and that his wife gives him a little wink now and then, I say this:

1. I hope one of your fat friends sits on you until you say uncle. Then sits on you some more anyway.
2. Your wife only gives you a wink now and then because she’s probably @#$%ing one of your fat friends…you now, one of those nice guys, not one of those arrogant know-it-alls that probably now watches every calorie she ingests.

Another ad I need to comment on is GM Canada’s “Cars Gone Wild/Trucks Gone Wild” event. This one aggravates me, not by how unbelievably bad it is, but how unbelievably boring it is considering the material they were working with.

Now, I don’t know about you, but merely seeing cars and trucks taking curves on closed streets and hearing about the great deals GM has for consumers doesn’t do it for me. That’s not in the spirit of “Gone Wild” by any stretch of the imagination.

I want to see flashing headlights, open hoods, open trunks, preferably with shock absorber action, maybe some “come hither” wheel spinning…and, of course, airbags! What a missed opportunity.

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